Long Distance Lovers

Although the last time I dated someone who lived more than an hour from me, I wasn't even driving a car (which made long-distance that much longer), I currently sit with several women who are involved in long-distance relationships.  One couple met on vacation and live on opposite sides of the country.  One woman is dating a man who is currently incarcerated.  For whatever reason, some times people fall in love at great distances.  Whether these distances are physical or emotional, I get to hear all about the gaps between clients and their partners.

Stats are varying in regards to "successful" long distance relationships, as well as how many people are in relationships that render them apart from their partner.  But here's a nifty little statistic picture that helps us get a handle on who really is doing it from afar:

I've also found statistics that read "30% of LDRs work out," whatever that means...

Whether the long distance relationship you find yourself in has an end date or end goal in mind also affects the relationship itself, just like all relationships.  If you know you'll be together at this point in time, or know that you are working towards the same goal (getting married, having kids, moving to the same continent), your relationship is probably more likely to "work out" than those long distance relationships which do not have an ending point or a set next step in mind.  But this goes for all relationships, and I think that's the point I'd like to make in this post: Regardless of how far away or how close together you live to your significant other, you MUST be on the same page as far as goals, hopes, and next steps.

Many times we find ourselves in relationships we are really happy in and having the time of our life.  Often, we don't want this good time to end.  But, if we don't communicate with our partner what we hope our next steps together as a couple are, our partner does not know.  So, how can we gauge what we will do and where we will go together if we never get input from the other person in our relationship?  Whether this communication is lacking because of physical distance or emotional distance, without this vital planning, we can never expect to get where we plan to be going together, alone.

So, best wishes to all couples out there, far apart or close together.  Those with physical distance may be working harder to connect physically, whereas those who are living together may still not be emotionally open to their partner about future wants and needs.  Whatever your hang-up, talk about it! 

If you find yourself involved in, or thinking about getting involved in, a long-distance relationship, be sure to try to follow these tips to staying sane.  Actually, these tips could and should be used for all relationships, no matter how far apart you are from one another.